Pitch Slam Entry 3: Dirty Limerick, YA Historical (80's)

Title: DIRTY LIMERICK

Genre: YA/Historical (‘80’s)

Word Count: 55,000


Pitch: Mean limericks about popular kids still went viral in the ‘80s. When 15-year-old Ricki’s best friend outs her as the author, her social-life plummets, until she uses her rhyming skills in an enterprising way.


First 250: 

There once was a girl with a crush
Seeing Mike was a rad freakin’ rush
But he never looked her way
Never had nice things to say
So the girl’s heart was a big bowl of mush.

Omigosh, omigosh, omigosh. I’d stood on my best friend’s porch for five minutes with my fist pitched in the air and ready to knock on the door. Honestly, she wouldn’t care if I just walked in. But, what if I walked in and saw her totally making out with Mike? No. She’d never do that to me. It was a miracle that Mike had agreed to attend her party at all. I still tried to wrap my head around the fact that we’d be in a room together, all…night…long.

My fist inched closer to the door, but then I rolled my eyes and dropped my hand to check that my shirt was tucked in straight and my cute belt was centered and my jeans were still pegged and the pennies in my loafers were still shiny.

“I’m a total basket-case,” I said to myself. “Stop it.”

I knocked quickly – wrap, wrap – then lightly touched my bangs to double-check they were teased and unmovable, just the way I liked them. But, would Mike like them that way? Feet pounded down the carpeted steps on the other side of the door and in a second, Katie whipped the door open. She rushed outside, slamming the door behind her, and gave me a squishy hug.